How to Talk About Sex Toys with Your Partner

Have you ever thought about incorporating sex toys into your intimate moments with your partner but worried about making it awkward? Don’t fret; we’re here to guide you through this conversation and make it as smooth as possible.

Introducing sex toys can add a thrilling dimension to your sexual experiences. Vibrators can provide heightened sensations, position straps enable you to explore new and exciting positions, and BDSM toys open the door to kinky roleplay scenarios. However, we acknowledge that there’s often a stigma surrounding the use of sex toys in partnered sex.

Some individuals might feel intimidated, fearing that these adult toys could replace them. Others worry that suggesting sex toys could negatively impact their relationship. We’re here to reassure you that sex toys are not a replacement for human connection; instead, they can enhance your intimacy and bring a new level of excitement to your shared experiences.

The key to a successful introduction of sex toys into your relationship lies in open and honest communication. When approached properly, discussing sex toys with your partner can strengthen your connection and make your intimate moments even more satisfying.

Rest assured, this conversation won’t jeopardize your relationship; in fact, it has the potential to bring you closer together.

Now, let’s delve into a step-by-step guide on how to broach the topic of sex toys with your partner smoothly and without any awkwardness.

What to Do When Talking to Your Partner About Sex Toys

What to Do When Talking to Your Partner About Sex Toys

1. Foster Open and Regular Discussions About Sex

Before diving into the world of sex toys, consider your current level of communication with your partner regarding sexual matters. Are you both comfortable discussing sex, even outside of the bedroom? Have you talked about your desires and fantasies? These are crucial aspects to evaluate before initiating a conversation about adult toys.

Starting a conversation about sex toys out of the blue, especially if you’ve never discussed sexual topics before, might catch your partner off guard. To make the discussion more seamless, work on building an open and trusting environment where both of you feel comfortable talking about your sexual experiences.

Begin by sharing thoughts about your past encounters and your individual preferences. Once you’ve established this foundation of open communication, introducing the idea of sex toys will feel more natural.

2. Keep It Casual and Relaxed

Approach the topic of sex toys with a sense of ease and nonchalance. Avoid building it up as a monumental milestone in your relationship, as this can lead to unnecessary pressure and anxiety.

Remember, it’s entirely normal to desire new experiences and sexual exploration, so there’s no need to make a big fuss about it. Being overly nervous or awkward during the conversation can also influence your partner’s response, so try to stay relaxed and composed.

3. Highlight the Pleasure for Both

Highlight the Pleasure for Both

During your discussion, underscore that introducing sex toys is about enhancing pleasure for both of you, not a replacement for your intimate connection. Reassure your partner that you love your sexual experiences together and that sex toys are merely a way to add excitement.

It’s important to be mindful of your choice of words since different individuals may react differently to this topic. When introducing specific toys, take the time to explain their features and how they can bring pleasure to both of you.

For a smoother start, consider beginning with less intimidating options, such as Inya the rose, instead of something more substantial like an 8-inch dildo. Additionally, be attuned to your partner’s emotional reactions; showing them toys that closely resemble genitals may trigger insecurities or body image concerns.

4. Honor Your Partner’s Preferences

When broaching the subject of incorporating sex toys into your intimate life, it’s essential to prioritize open communication and respect for your partner’s preferences. If your partner expresses an interest in trying specific sex toys, take note of their desires and preferences.

Conversely, if there are sex toys on your list that they are not comfortable with or eager to try, it’s crucial to respect their decision and explore alternative options. Remember that using sex toys should be an enjoyable and mutually satisfying experience for both of you, so it’s vital to consider their input and boundaries.

5. Maintain Pre and Post-Use Discussions

Even after obtaining your partner’s consent and acquiring the toys, ongoing communication is key. Before engaging in any intimate activities with the toys, ensure that you discuss your intentions and any relevant safety guidelines. Make sure your partner understands how to use the toy, even if you will be the one operating it.

After using the sex toys, engage in a post-session conversation about each other’s experiences. Did they enjoy using the toy? Were they comfortable with it? Are there any specific sex positions or fantasies they’d like to explore with it? These discussions are essential for keeping the lines of communication open and ensuring that you both have a positive and fulfilling experience.

3 Things to Avoid When Discussing Sex Toys With Your Partner

3 Things to Avoid When Discussing Sex Toys With Your Partner

Now that we’ve covered how to effectively talk to your partner about using sex toys, it’s equally important to be aware of the things you should avoid during this conversation. These pitfalls can create tension and misunderstandings in your relationship. Let’s explore what you should steer clear of:

1. Surprising Them During Intimacy

Surprising your partner with sex toys during the heat of the moment is generally not advisable, especially if you’ve never discussed or used sex toys together before. Springing this on them without their consent can lead to confusion and disrupt the intimate atmosphere. It’s always best to initiate a conversation about introducing sex toys before attempting to use them in the bedroom.

However, if you have been incorporating sex toys into your sexual experiences for a while, surprising them with a new toy can be more acceptable. Just ensure that the surprise aligns with your established preferences. For example, if you’ve been using vibrators, introducing a different type of vibrator can be exciting rather than confusing.

2. Pressuring Your Partner to Agree

Respect your partner’s autonomy and boundaries when it comes to sex toys. Avoid pressuring or coercing them into saying yes if they are not comfortable with the idea. Everyone has their own reasons and pace when it comes to trying new things in the bedroom.

Instead of pressuring them, focus on open communication and education about adult toys. This will create a more supportive and understanding atmosphere.

3. Disregarding Their Preferences

Listening is a crucial aspect of introducing sex toys into your relationship. When your partner shares their desires and preferences regarding specific sex toys, make an effort to include these items on your shopping list (unless they are hard limits).

Likewise, if there are particular sex toys that your partner is not interested in exploring, respect their decision and explore other options that both of you can enjoy.

In Conclusion

Sex Toys

Exploring sex toys with your partner can indeed bring excitement and novelty to your intimate life. By fostering open and respectful communication, you can introduce these pleasures without causing tension or misunderstandings in your relationship.

So, go ahead and initiate the conversation! If you have any questions about sex toys, feel free to use our blog as a resource; we offer a wealth of articles on various adult toys to enhance your experiences. Enjoy your journey into this exciting territory!